Deceived and Divided
Often, our greatest obstacle isn't the world around us, but the civil war raging within. We constantly sabotage our own goals because we fail to align our actions with our true desires.
"Circumstances are what deceive us—you must be discerning in them. We embrace evil before good. We desire the opposite of what we once desired. Our prayers are at war with our prayers, our plans with our plans." Seneca, Moral Letters, 45.6
The woman declares her desire to marry a good man but spends her entire life with bad men. The man expresses his desire to find a good job but he has not yet started his job search. The business executives attempt to implement two separate business strategies simultaneously through straddling yet they become surprised when their efforts fail to produce results.
All of these people, just as is often true for us too, are deceived and divided. One hand is working against the other. Martin Luther King Jr. described a personal inner battle which every person faces between their virtuous and wicked nature.
The Stoics state that war emerges from our competing desires and our impaired judgment and flawed thinking patterns. People who are unaware of their actual needs will not recognize what they truly desire. The process of self-discovery leads to the realization of our hidden inner conflicts. The process of self-discovery leads to the realization of our hidden inner conflicts.
Common Questions
Why do we often fail to achieve our own goals?
Division among us leads to frequent failures as our group remains divided. We desire one thing yet our behavior together with our hidden wants contradict our main objective which results in ongoing internal conflict.
What causes this internal "civil war"?
The Stoics believe that people experience inner conflict because they have opposing desires and make incorrect assessments and they lack knowledge of their true selves. Most people do not take time to reflect on their actual driving forces which guide their conduct.
How can we stop working against ourselves?
By pausing to ask ourselves clarifying questions like, "What do I really want?" and "What am I actually after?" This deep self-reflection helps expose inconsistent wishes so we can align our actions with our true goals.
Your Key Takeaway:You must stop your current behavior of pursuing two different possibilities. You need to take time to assess your needs through an unyielding process which will help you remove any opposing needs and create a path that leads to your objectives.